FINDING BALANCE - HOW TO GET THROUGH THIS

A friend recently asked me why my blog posts are so few lately.  I've never been particularly prolific compared to many more disciplined bloggers, but the two blogs I write have seen a downturn lately.  I blame the current president.  That should be an absurd laugh line, but unfortunately it's true.

My world slid off center 18 months ago and I have not yet found a way to right it...or myself.  And most recently I think I was done in completely by the "zero tolerance" immigration policy where this administration used the removal of children from their parents as a deterrent to immigrants enter our country either legally or illegally.  Putting children in fenced in "cages" in detention centers, from infancy through age 17, and in many cases eventually shipping them to far away northern states to live in shelters or in foster homes while in hundreds of cases their parents were deported without them, well....  Government sponsored kidnapping sort of tipped me over.  The cruelty never ends with this guy.  My frantic attempts to take action have kicked into a higher gear.

My writing has been of the letter, email, FAX, postcard variety to Congress, Cabinet members, and media outlets.  Every time I sit down to write a blog post, nothing but political issues come to mind.  Every other topic seems frivolous in comparison, so I close the Blogger page and walk away.

I realize I am out of balance.  I realize I've lost touch with essential parts of myself -- my creativity and humor in particular.  Oh, I still laugh, but not as much I don't think.  I have some modicum of creativity on display in my garden and the baby blankets I crochet for the layette program at a local social service agency.  But I've lost a sense of what my life was like "before".  I don't remember that more innocent time anymore or what occupied my thinking and my days.

This weekend, I hope, put me on the healing path to finding myself again.  Among other events that I may write about in other posts, I also signed up for a workshop in my town with John Pavlovitz.  Do you know of him?  He's a liberal Christian pastor (even though once fired from his church since he went public with views some parishioners didn't like), book author, blogger, and media/online hero of the Resistance. https://johnpavlovitz.com

I've read his blog faithfully for over a year.  I've found great resonance and affirmation there.  I've become a Fangirl.  To have the opportunity to hear him speak and to work with him in a small group at a local church was sort of amazing.  He was totally engaging: wise, gentle, smart, articulate, emotionally available, and so funny!

He talked about compassion burnout and how we can work for change and not lose ourselves.  Some of his suggestions:

1.  Engage AND withdraw.  Yes, we must fight and not give up.  And we must take breaks, withdraw into healing and life-affirming practices like creative arts, time in nature, hanging out with friends and family, and just being in silence.  We have to replenish ourselves.

2.  Be engaged in social media.  Yes, he actually said that.  Social media helps us find affinity "tribes", provides information about what's going on, and cultivates hope to see so many similarly engaged and active.  Then he said to get off social media.  Yes, that too.  When we read or hear the same story over and over it compounds what is happening beyond what is real.  It can also be addicting and toxic.  Use it, but with boundaries.

3.  Play.  Cultivate the things in life that make you laugh, that bring you pure enjoyment.  We can have compassion and a passion for activism and still be essentially happy people.

4.  Create.  Follow your muse.  Artists of any genre relate to, interpret, and define the world as it is and as we want it to be.  Use art to vision the future we want to create.

5.  Cultivate gratitude.  Hope is an aspiration for the future.  Gratitude is now, and not dependent upon anything changing.  There is always somethings to be grateful for.  Make a list.

6.  Know who you are not.  The urgency of activism right now creates a "Superman Complex".  Face it.  We are not Superheros.  We are people doing our best.  That's enough.

7.  Share the load.  Don't go it alone.  Find the power of supportive community and act together.  Be a model for activism but know not everyone will follow.  Find your allies.

8.  Take a hope inventory.  What is the vision that propels us?   What keeps us going?  Keep that vision in the forefront as motivation instead of reacting around anger and despair.

Much to contemplate here. I see some I am doing well and others I'm not doing at all.  I see where I'm burned out and why.  I see that being out of balance is only hurting me.  I don't want to hurt me.

This is only one event of the past few days that cracked me open --the others also in ways both lovely and painful.  All of it is fodder for growth....and a few more blog posts.

At least, that's the view from here...©