Everyone is reacting in their own ways to the election outcome. It's only been 5 days and it feels like 5 years of disbelief and grief to me; I'm sort of paralyzed in sadness. Others have found their fervor for activism and are ready to do battle with all the wrongs he plans to visit upon people who are different or disagree with him. Good for them! I'll bring the snacks.
Of course those who voted for him (or didn't vote for President at all, which amounts to the same thing) are happy as clams. They've been given the "un-PC" go-ahead to act out their worst selves. Or they have been given hope for a "shake up" that they think will get their jobs back and put money in the bank again or keep those "other" people who are not like "us" out of the country. They get to feel the self-righteous ardor of those who were willing to sacrifice the good for the perfect. (Hello Bernie and 3rd Party voters.) They have all put their faith in a selfish narcissist, a billionaire (if you believe him, but who knows since he won't release any information on his finances) unprepared for leading our country, with only sketchy policies and plans jotted down to "fix it".
Of course what they also got was the pleasure of putting that Bitch in her place. Don't get me started. Can't even go there yet.
I am incredibly weary. I am in full-blown grief. I recognize it. Been here. All the stages swirl around except I'm not able to get too far past denial and anger quite yet. Or tears. Good god, what has our country become? The world is laughing and/or appalled and very worried. Hillary supporters are stunned and take cold comfort in the fact that she won the popular vote. More people voted for her than for him; more wanted her as our President. I do take comfort in that. The Electoral College's intention to save the masses from themselves by not allowing the populace to directly vote for an unsuitable President went off the rails. Again.
Yesterday I took the drastic measure of signing out of Facebook for the foreseeable future. I was overwhelming myself and others with the non-stop newsfeed of posts of both outrage and support for those of us who are broken.
It felt good for awhile to connect into communities of people, like Pantsuit Nation, a true phenomenon of Facebook -- a FB group formed by a woman in Maine intended to be a safe place for Hillary supporters to "gather" and share uplifting hopeful stories and encourage each other to action on her behalf. In only two weeks, by Election Day, it had garnered 2,000,000 members (only allowed in through someone already a member -- word of mouth). The posts were so hopeful and joyful. Since Election Day it has grown to over 3,000,000 members, as people find solace and calls to action there.
But soon I became obsessed with seeking out articles and posts that would help me find meaning and uplift and passing them on in 'share' posts. My sons told me it was over the top; Hub told me I was too constantly online; I know I was quoting "Facebook" as if it was a real thing and not just a bunch of pixels. A friend and I had a disagreement about how the DNC vs. Bernie Sanders played into this outcome; another told me to back off because she was in such pain and overwhelm she couldn't take it anymore. Even my good intentions to help those hurting, and to build community together, was having the opposite effect.
I'll admit that only 16 hours into no FB I'm twitching a little bit, which is likely an indication of the depth of my addiction. I feel very isolated and alone this morning. My "FB Tribe" is out there without me, sharing and supporting. And I don't know the latest this and that cool or abhorrent thing happening in this aftermath. Well, have another cup of coffee and take a deep breath.
It's come to this: Last night I was so depressed I was barely functional. I fell asleep on the sofa for a couple hours, but when I went to bed I was wide awake. I came back downstairs at 11:30 and sat in the dark. I decided to meditate and did a series of guided meditations until the wee hours. I got hungry and made my favorite healthy treat -- blueberries, vanilla yogurt, walnuts, and cinnamon. But the berries were too tart, so I added a teaspoon of sugar. The yogurt was too sour, so I shot a dollop of whipped cream over the top. I already had a bad taste in my mouth...I had to find a way to sweeten my existence even if only in a small bowl of comfort. I finally fell asleep on the sofa at 3:30, up at 6:45.
It's just like that now.
At least, that's the view from here...©
We were all so invested in Hillary winning that it's naturally hard to get past the shock that she didn't. And more importantly, that she lost to a person so despicable, a bully and a racist. But to paraphrase another blogger I read this morning, we've sucked it up through a lot of dark, national hard times and the nation has still come out the other side in tact. We must suck it up again.
ReplyDeleteSo we need to move past the grieving/mourning what could have been with a Hillary presidency, lick our wounds and gain our strength back over the next two months. We need to be strong to hold TD's feet to the fire when (not if) he oversteps his authority in office.
P.S. Sending you cyber hugs.
ReplyDeletethanks, I can use all the hugs i can get. :)
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