I'm going to sleep for a week or so. 11 months of planning and fretting and focused attention culminated in Son One's wedding last Friday night. It was absolutely beautiful. Not a dry eye during the moving ceremony and heartfelt toasts at the reception.Son One and his gorgeous wife are so obviously in love and so incredibly happy...yet with the the realistic groundedness that comes from having been together for 3 years, raising a child together from DIL's previous marriage, buying and fixing up a home together, and working full-time in jobs that do not reflect their professional capabilities. (But they feel lucky to have employment at all.) These "kids" are starting their marriage with love in their hearts, but not necessarily stars in their eyes. This should work out.
We've been the onsite parents for wedding support and planning since DIL's family lives far away from here. All were in town for the wedding, we in-laws meeting for the first time. They are friendly, generous people who obviously love their daughter and their other 4 grown children who were here also. I loved how much they all smiled! We hosted everyone for the rehearsal, day of wedding bride and bridesmaids prep, and day after wedding get-together for gift opening, so we saw quite a lot of each other even outside the wedding itself.
It was a bit like "Meet the Fockers" at times, but with a twist. Hub and I are Unitarian Universalist, Buddhist-leaning, meditation-sitting, Yoga-posturing, Kirtan-chanting, Obama-loving Liberal Democrats, but with a bent toward agendas and organization and punctuality, especially where event planning comes in. They seemed to be Catholic Christian, FOX-news watching, Tea Party-leaning Republican Conservatives, but with a free floating, free spirit, go-with-the-flow attitude toward organization and timeframes. Just imagine.
Those differences were interesting to note, and I am certain they were duly noted by our counterparts as well. Yet also true is that we are all good, caring people who love our kids beyond reason. We all had a lovely time at the wedding. And that is what was important this week -- more important than politics or differences in personal style.
And now, if you'll excuse me, my inner Introvert is screaming for solitude and quiet. I have a bag full of yarn, a DVR full of favorite TV show season premiers, and a 'fridge full of leftovers. I will come out of hibernation in a few days. Maybe.
At least, that's the view from here...©
It is always interesting to me that well-intended people can often get along when they need to. My father was the only democrat in many of the communities where we lived but he gave a helping hand to many a kid and nobody "dissed" him because he wasn't one with the group. I have belonged to several professional groups where the range of politics and personal experience is almost beyond belief - but when we work on a common goal - we manage to even enjoy each other's company. My husband (far left of socialism) is on a committee with a rabid conservative and they continue to keep peace by talking about their common purpose and NOT their differences. I am so glad the celebration was a true loving event and one that will bring memory-smiles for decades to come. You, your family, your new in-laws all deserve that.
ReplyDeletePolitics is a funny thing. I think one's political leanings do inform a world view that creates a response to life that is inherently different from those who hold differing views. But there is a common ground that can be found, as you say, when working toward a common goal. In our case, the wedding was far more important to me than debating Obamacare or the government shut down. Maybe another time.... :)
ReplyDeleteFROM AN EMAIL: I love good writing and.............yours qualifies! I encourage you to remain free from
ReplyDeleteagenda or topic and............just let it flow. However, for your consideration, I’m especially
interested in your emotional aftermath from all the anticipation spirals preparing for a wedding,
experiencing the high of the ceremony& reception and, then, several days later having to
recalibrate to a “regular?” day. Now that’s a parental..............”trip”!!
In short and without skills to articulate, we are one year out, but I think the topic would
have some measure of universality for a lot of people. Bottom line, it’s your blog, so you go with what
moves You.
Just a Fan
All well put!
ReplyDeleteFROM AN EMAIL: Weddings. You were kind of the mother of the groom and the bride. Our son and his girl friend will be married next August, and I was at first thinking about how it would be nice not to be the MOB, but like your daughter in law, the bride's parents are far away. We will see how that goes. They want to be married on a beach by a Buddhist officiant friend, and her family is Catholic. Hope it goes O.K.
ReplyDeleteKeep writing, you always give me something to contemplate in my own life.