Let's review: Remember my posts about investigating and possibly moving to a "LifePlan Community"? We are. Not yet, but Hub and I have decided we will leave our too big house with two much maintenance and too much property in 1-1/2 to 2-1/2 years. No, it's not imminent. But it is on the not too distant horizon and we know how fast time goes by. We are in "clean and clear" mode attacking storage areas, unused "stuff" in our spaces, and even starting to eye our furnishings and other everyday items with a gimlet eye. What will go away (sold or donated) and what will move with us? So far I see very little I personally want to load into the moving van. I'm excited about a clean slate/new start.
So, just as I want to declutter, hauling out Christmas decor seems the opposite. It's just a short-term blast of old red and green that no longer sparks much joy for me. Hub just set up the tree -- artificial, which we've had for years and which I have not quite gotten over. I loved our forest trees, but alas, they were a LOT of work, mostly for Hub. I will throw some decorations at it later. Done.
I have other items to set here and there but mostly I am keeping it to the very, very barest minimum since we will barely be here to see it and then in short order will have to lug it all back up to the attic.
"Barely here?" you ask. Yes. We are leaving for 10 pre-Christmas days in Hawaii. Last year I got annoyed at Christmas and the enormous difficulty we seemed to have getting family and/or friends together to do much pre-December 24th celebrating, so in a huff I declared, "Next year I'm just leaving!" So we made reservations to head to our Kauai retreat.
Now, of course, I am barely over my month-long September-October Europe trip and wonder why I decided to add another trip to my schedule and more stress to the usual holiday madness. (OK, as noted, it's not that "mad". We are mostly just here in the house alone trying not to eat too many cookies while we look for a half-way decent movie to watch.) So, Kauai will be fun -- decked out for the holidays with the addition of palm trees and beaches and sunny skies. Once there, I'll love it. As always.
What has slowly evolved is how many fewer opportunities I have to see my family. I've noticed over time they seem to have their own lives, which do not feature ME! I don't get it, but it's true. Hahaha. There is no rift, no animosity; we all get along great. It's just that they are in the thick of the "busy" part of life -- careers, homes, kids, friends, activities, exhaustion. I'm sad a lot that I don't see or hear from them as much. It's even true of the grand-girls as they've grown into pre-teen and teen years with their own interests and activities that put "Grandma Days" low on the priority list. In spite of my efforts, we had not been all together in one place at the same time since August when we welcomed our new grandson to the family. That drought ended this week as we gathered on Thanksgiving at Son Two and DIL's new house with new baby. We had a great time together.
In years past December used to be the month of intensive family time, so even when we didn't see each other as often, I knew December would compensate. But in recent years it seems not so much. No group outings to the tree farm, our two December birthdays are combined if we can manage a gathering at all, shorter time together on Christmas Eve and/or Christmas Day. No New Years festivities for sure.
It's weird to grow older and have the time, interest, and desire for family togetherness run smack up against the exact time of life for them when there are just too many demands to make that happen. So we take trips. We look forward to moving to an older adult community where we will find lots to do and people to hang out with. We will still try to beware of too much cookie eating and will still complain that every Christmas movie has the same plot. We will still miss our kids. But life changes and evolves and what once was a season I found overwhelmingly busy has become a season that is far too quiet. Decorating the house just doesn't seem that important.
Wearing my Santa hat under a palm tree, spending a couple of nights in the guest apartment at our future new community enjoying their lobby trees and beautifully lit grounds, dropping off donations to charitable organizations and the local school for their gift-giving project, walking the local Arboretum hung with brightly colored, holiday-themed yarn pom poms (about 50 of which I made and donated), strolling the waterfront marina to see the light displays and lighted boats and the reindeer in a big pen, sipping a peppermint mocha at our fave coffee spot, having a festive mocktail at the local speakeasy...these have become Christmas. Not at home, but in community -- where people of good cheer gather to share the season. And I will be with my family on Christmas Day, here in our big old house for at least one more Christmas. For that I am incredibly grateful. 🎄
At least, that's the view from here...©
Photo Credit: www.pixabay.com
So many significant aspects of life I hear in this.
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I believe we all have unique life stories, but underneath are universal themes. That's why I share my experiences -- so others may see themselves as well. Thanks for reading.
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