The word "exercise" is synonymous with high school PE to me. I sucked at PE. I was not athletic and didn't care to be. I was not strong or coordinated and had no natural inclination for sports or games. I had no endurance. It was torture. And embarrassing. I still feel that way.Maybe that's why I was drawn to Hub. I have a "jock" husband -- star pitcher (ask him about his no-hitter), game winning quarterback (ask about the quarterback sneak against cross-town rivals). He still absolutely owns the double-diamond runs on his snowboard, at 64 years old. He's a natural at most sports stuff. For years he wanted me to like physical activity too. He was patient and encouraging and unfailingly persistent. We tried hiking, kayaking, snowshoeing, jogging, walking, biking...I would start out with good intentions, then at his urging to go "just a little further" there would inevitably be that point where I was frustrated, ashamed, and in tears, vowing, "never again".
He has learned over the decades together that I will no more leap at the chance to do a challenging hike or take to the snow-covered mountains with him, than he will ever want to sit with a cup of coffee and write a poem or read for hours on end with a purring cat on his lap. We've made our peace with this divide. I will go for the occasional hike or walk or bike ride or kayak paddle -- at a slower, more leisurely pace than he would if he were alone. But we are companionable about it now and I don't cry. He will also often go off on his adventures alone while I read and write and sip my coffee (alas, no more kitties).
Yet, I know a bit more physical activity that gets the heart pumping would be a good thing for me. How can I motivate myself? This is a question I've been asking for most of my sedentary-leaning life. The other day I decided to boil it down to what I like: Pleasure, Ease, and Beauty. So, how can those be part of my movement practice?
Pleasure: Music -- I could listen to I-Tunes while walking. Movies and TV -- I could watch while on my treadmill. Coffee Shops, Art Galleries, Book Stores, Libraries -- I could make these destinations for my walks. Peacefulness -- I could take a flow Yoga class that is a bit more aerobic.
Ease & Comfort: I could walk/ride on flat terrain, eschewing the hills. I could use hiking poles on (gently sloping) trails. I could do outdoor activities only in pleasant weather.
Beauty: I could do my walking/riding in arboretums, through pretty neighborhoods, along waterfronts and in forests.
I could dance -- a winning combination of heart-pumping movement, pleasure, ease, comfort and beauty. I've gotten away from my Ecstatic Dance practice since I stopped facilitating this for other people. But tonight is Ecstatic Dance night and the gal who took over for me will be leading folks in an hour of joyful, meditative movement to a playlist that will both rock and sooth the soul.
Maybe it's time I started to look at exercise differently; maybe it can be pleasurable, easy, and beautiful. Hmmmm….we'll see….
At least, that's the view from here…. ©
I have yet to find an exercise that I like so I sure can identify with this post. I like your solutions to finding a way to exercise using things you like---beauty, comfort and easy---as incentives. I hope it works for you.
ReplyDeleteAnd there is nothing wrong with couples not sharing every aspect of their leisure time activities together. Sometimes I think it's better when they can each have something for themselves to excel at within the family and not have to compete in their own home. The key is to be able to verbally share the experiences afterward and take honest joy or interest in what the other has done/seen/accomplished. At least that MY view..... LOL
My husband and I walk - long walks of 2 to 4 miles - and we don't walk together. When we were younger we would bike ride and walk together but we lived in a small town and walking to the store, post office, school was part of the day. In this larger city, he walks to or from his studio. In other words he will walk for a practical purpose. I, however, walk to clear my mind and it isn't helpful to do that with someone. We are fine with not spending every minutes of work or leisure together. We have been married for over 42 years...and still counting.
ReplyDeleteFROM AN EMAIL: I was just ahead of you in P.E. class - doing poorly. The only C I ever got was the quarter I was supposed to learn to play baseball. It was a vision thing, but that was not known at the time.
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