SUPER KIDS

It's Monday -- one of my fave days to sit down with the local paper because the feature "Super Kid" appears on Mondays.  This column highlights a high school student from within the wider community who is, indeed, "super".  They are usually academic standouts, with well-defined goals, and lots of energy for living a full and productive life now and presumably in the future.  They are bright, promising, motivated -- all those things we celebrate as healthy and vital to success.

It is heartening to read about these kids.  This is the flip side of the too frequently sad and bad news in the headlines, often about the kids who have gone down a different and destructive path.  The Super Kids reassure me that our world is in good hands -- the generation to come will be capable, responsible, creative, and committed to service to our community and the world.  I feel a sense of relief and gratitude.

I notice some characteristic similarities about them, regardless of presumed socio-economic status, gender, or ethnicity.  Most are taking multiple Advanced Placement classes, to ready themselves for college, which most have already chosen along with their intended majors.  They are generally involved in a number of extra-curricular activities as well -- sports, music, drama, art, student government, or leadership clubs.  Many also volunteer in the community for museums, animal shelters, or charitable organizations.  They tend to have strong family ties and many have a strong connection to a spiritual/faith community.

And they say they have very little free time -- which is where I start to worry.  Scheduling themselves to the minute, worrying about SAT scores, working to build an impressive extra-curricular resume while maintaining an impressive GPA starts to sound a lot like a recipe for stress.  They are always smiling in the photo that accompanies the article, but I have to wonder if there are times when it all gets to be just too much for their 16- or 17-year-old selves.

Maybe I'm projecting -- I am currently on a self-imposed "sabbatical" from doing, doing, doing.  I've written previous posts about taking some steps back from my usual chaotic calendaring of activities, but it seems so easy to slip back into "too busy" mode.  I blame our culture.  We place a high premium on our shining work ethic.  That's why at first blush these "Super Kids" can be elevated to Top Role Model status.  They are keeping all the balls in the air, smiling for the camera, and taking on the world! Be like them!!!  So tempting....

But most teens are neither the front page sad stories, nor the Local Section Super Kids.  They are just regular kids going about their teen years trying to muddle through and come out the other side with only a few (hopefully heal-able) scars.  That's how I was.  That's how my boys were.  Mostly happy, lots of friends, pretty good grades, some hobbies and interests and activities, a few set-backs, a few disasters, learning and growing and making it through.  Then, on to college and wondering what to "be" when it's over and sometimes still wondering well into adulthood if the choices were the right ones and asking, "When is it too late to change course?" (Never).

I honor the Super Kids.  I am amazed at their youthful accomplishments.  And I hope they don't burn out before they hardly begin.  "Slow down," I want to tell them.  Learn to breathe and "be".  We need role models for self-care and self-reflection too.  Doing it all only lasts until one day you realize you can barely do anything without exhaustion enveloping every move.  It's OK to be "regular" sometimes, doing work you can enjoy, surrounded by a supportive family and few good friends, and nurturing a connection to something larger than yourself.  That's enough to save our world too.

At least, that's the view from here....©